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Radical Religious Group Protests Abortion By
Spitting on Newborn Babies
by Lefty Paige

KANSAS -- A radical religious group in Kansas has come up with an
unorthodox was to protest abortion, by picketing maternity wards and
spitting on all the newborn babies. Several parents whose babies were
the victims of the spit attacks complained to local officials who sought
an injunction barring the group from all local hospitals.

Is There a First Amendment Right to Spit on Babies?
“It’s not right,” said the leader of the group who wished not to be
named. “This court order clearly violates our first amendment right to
free speech. It’s a travesty of justice.”

“Abortion is evil,” said another member. “We have a right to protest it
and we felt this was the best way to get our message across.
Sometimes you have to shock people.”
                                                     --continued below--
Point Not Taken
But most people don’t understand the protests at all. “I just don’t
get the sense behind protesting abortion in a maternity ward,” said a
nurse who was spit on while carrying a newborn. She has worked a
the hospital for over twenty years and claims she has never seen
anything like this.

“I’m not for censorship,” said one father, “but come on. What
purpose does twenty adults spitting on my newborn son
accomplish? This was supposed to be a personal, joyful moment for
my family. Not a stage for their agenda.”

“It’s sad that the court even had to get involved and teach these
people about common decency,” said the mother. “They should
know better.”

There's No Appeal To Baby Spitting
Doctors who testified on behalf of the parents said the protestors
had crossed the line. “In my mind, this isn’t about free speech at all.
It’s about hygiene. For crying out loud, you just don’t go spitting on
newborn babies no matter how noble of an act you may think it is.”

Several parents are considering lawsuits, especially, they say, if their
babies get sick.

The group has filed an appeal, but experts say they don’t stand
much of a chance for reversal. In the meantime, the group has
found a new way to continue their protests: a baby boycott. They
have each taken a vow not to have any more children until abortion
is outlawed worldwide. “If we can’t spit on the babies then, damn
it, we won’t have any,” said the group’s leader.
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