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Camp Obama Analyzing Hillary's Tears
By William Satire
GUAM - According to sources deep within Camp Obama who asked not to
be named, the campaign is hard at work analyzing Hillary Clinton’s tears in
the hopes of developing an antidote.
“These were very powerful tears,” said the Obama insider. “They melted
the entire granite state.”
The source went on to say that, based on their analysis so far, the tears
appeared to be very clever and even have highly resistant and mutable
properties. He further suggested that black people, especially, should be
worried about the threat posed by Senator Clinton’s tears.
“We’re heading into South Carolina now where there are 45% African
Americans,” the source said. “We have to do something to prevent these
tears from melting them, too. Especially after Katrina.”
By William Satire
GUAM - According to sources deep within Camp Obama who asked not to
be named, the campaign is hard at work analyzing Hillary Clinton’s tears in
the hopes of developing an antidote.
“These were very powerful tears,” said the Obama insider. “They melted
the entire granite state.”
The source went on to say that, based on their analysis so far, the tears
appeared to be very clever and even have highly resistant and mutable
properties. He further suggested that black people, especially, should be
worried about the threat posed by Senator Clinton’s tears.
“We’re heading into South Carolina now where there are 45% African
Americans,” the source said. “We have to do something to prevent these
tears from melting them, too. Especially after Katrina.”
